Savannah Feb. l2th 1864
I received a letter from you yesterday darling telling me you had heard of the birth of our baby. You said you had received a letter from Mr. Christian. I don't imagine why you did not receive our letters. Your Mother, Papa and Priss all wrote you and I wrote you the 3~ and 4th day. I suffered much more this time than I did the first and was not so well the third day but as soon as I was able I sat up in bed send a note to you thinking it would be gratifying for you to see my handwriting. I am sorry you have not heard from me for such a length of time. I do all I can to have you hear. I write regularly sometimes every week and never any longer than two weeks without sending a letter. I am much oblidged for the name you suggested but I think I rather prefer calling my baby after a "rebel". Mr. Christian was right in the name I have given him, your full name. I think your Mother and Priss would have preferred my calling him "Thomas Robert" but as I have never known you by any other name than TJ I have given him that We all call him Tom already. I want to have him Christened as soon as Mr. Porter can come to do it. I have embroidered his Christening robe myself and everyone who has seen it says it equals French work. I am so sorry you can't see our boy. He is such a noble looking little fellow so ? and healthy looking and is so sweet and good. He is a great comfort to me darling and I already love him more than I can express but he has neither taken your place or the place of my angel child, never while life lasts can I forget his sweet smile or the music of his voice, the sound of his little footfall still haunts me ever. I think I can see the bright little ? flirting in twilight shadows. No I can never cease to regret his loss or treasure less tenderly his sacred memory. I now have two children, one in heaven the other on earth. God grant we may all meet him in that bright amber above. Do you never think darling his little arms are stretching out to take you up to him. I am always better when I think of him. The thought of his angel smile keeps my heart pure from many sins. I want to try to walk in the path that leads me to him. He always looks like one too bright and pure for earth. God took before his little spirit was touched by sin or sorrow. I attended his little grave regularly. I planted some violets there a week or two ago and this little lily of the valley is springing over hearts ? all over this little ?. As soon as the weather becomes milder I shall go out more frequently. Priss, Mary Eivens and I go together. I sympathyze so much with her for her loss and unlike mine her little boy was a few weeks older than ours was when he died and was a very sweet little fellow. None but those who have experienced it know what it is to lose a child. You don't express any wish to see our baby. I know you must be anxious to see him but I like to hear you say so. You know our only means of communication is the letters and I dwell on every word you write. I know you write under great restraint learning your letter may be exposed but it is very hard to have to be satisfied with journal letters. I have not boen general with mine and if they are exposed the deepest expression of affection from a woman to her husband is no disgrace to him and as for me I don't care if the whole world sees what I write you without half relieving my heart sometimes.. I know it will be a pleasure to you if you receive them. To think you will be away from us so long and I fmd myself hoping and expecting your return every day. My baby is well supplied thanks to his father's thoughtfulness and I much prefer your sending things to him. I am getting very well even tho I may have to go a little shabby
But I love to see my baby well dressed. The cloak and hood will be very acceptable when it comes. Mrs. Morris and I look for the packages every day. Cpt. Morris has sent her a great many boxes. Since she has been fortunate enough to receive everyone from the variety of articles he has sent you would suggest he had been a dealer in dry goods. He sent ribbons? flours? gloves, shoe soap ? silk memo, inking floss and almost anything one can need. I wrote you begging you to send me a bundle of white embroidery silk. but I don't think you ever got the letter and I want you to send some fine soap, powder and perfume for the baby. I met Cpt. Morris's little girl on Brell? Street dressed in a little lilac peliso? embroidered with white and a little silk hat trim with lace and ribbon. All the materials sent by her father. The little lady did not look much like war times. She is very sweet and ? it is too bad her father can't see her.
I want you to send some little socks and shoes for our boy. By the time I can get them he will be old enough to wear them and shoes from No.1 to from different sizes. If you don't, I [won't] be able to get shoes for him as they are very difficult to find and very expensive , 25 and 30 dollars a pair. You never say anything about my letters or answer what I wrote. I wrote you all about Horace being wounded and you must have received the letter you mention receiving a letter the 30th of September and I think that was the letter I wrote you all about his wound. He is still on crutches and Dr. Bullock says cannot go in service for a year yet. I wish you had sent the photograph you promised. You wrote me you were going to send one and I have looked very anxiously for it but have been disappointed. I only heard ? of Cpt. lanes? going to be married. I don't know if there is any truth in it. He has been returned to Richmond?, I was sorry I couldn't see him before he went away. He left while I was sick.
I saw the letter you wrote Mr. C. about Bessie's request. I did not think you could write. So Mrs. Christian and I read it. Now don't you feel ashamed? I am much obliged to Mr. C for sending for the cup. I hope you may be able to come home before long to bring it. You must not be at all jealous of the baby, I love him better for looking like you. I am only sorry he did not have dark eyes. No one can take your place with me. My heart is always ready to welcome you. I was pleased to hear you were ordered to the Florida knowing you will be much happier being in active service. You will not have so much time to dwell on your absent family. Your loved ones, baby and I are both as well as you could wish to see us. I am ? blessed with too given ? appetite for these hard times. ? Mr. Bostin died yesterday and is to be buried this afternoon. Ben is as ? as ever and I believe a little more so. I think the case is assuming quite a serious type. The attacks last sometimes until 12 O'clock at night. Mother, Papa and
Horace send love to you. Write whenever you have an opportunity and if you
can? ? ? send us a box of good things. Mann Harriet is delighted in the
prospect of getting a new dress. Baby sends a kiss. Accept a heart full of
much love yours ever Julia